THE SOUTH AFRICAN CHURCH: A VEHICLE FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL RESTITUTION!
"White people, I wish you can understand that we don't want your houses, your money or your jobs ... we want your hearts, your friendship, your love. We want you!"
These words of an unemployed, thirty something father and member of the Uniting Reformed Church in Khayelitsha at a Healing of Memories and Restitution workshop a month ago, made a big impression. As a black South African Christian he doesn't in the first place think about restitution in monetary terms. He isn't primarily interested in the material possessions of white people. He wants something much more significant - he wants white people to give themselves!
The psychological effects of Apartheid in South Africa have damaged many black people. It created circumstances for feelings of incompleteness and inferiority. To be white was considered to be more intelligent, more sophisticated, more attractive and more civilized. This belief in white superiority contributed to the separation of the different races. It made healthy interaction between white and black South Africans virtually impossible. The lack of interaction prevented opportunities for really getting to know and understanding each other. The separation of the people of South Africa contributed towards the entrenchment of impressions of white superiority and black inferiority.
Feelings of inferiority and unworthiness are very painful feelings. It can't be treated with money. The pain associated with these feelings doesn't disappear over night. It takes a very long time for these types of wounds to heal. One of the best ways to heal these wounds is by creating opportunities for white people to listen to the painful stories of black people... and to understand them better.
"Through the ears and hearts" of white people, black people will be able to embark on the healing process. The stories are not easy to listen to. These are painful stories - stories about black incompleteness and inferiority and white superiority, about black resentment and white guilt. These stories are important and need to be told... and to be listened to. Through story telling both black and white people will be able to re-discover their humanness in each other - a discovery that will contribute towards the restoration of the dignity of both black and white South Africans.
White people's "re-discovery" of the humanness of black South Africans must lead to the acknowledgement that a wrong has been committed. Acknowledgement of guilt will not only make a significant dent in the resentment of black people, but it will also make forgiveness come easier. Through the acknowledgement of guilt, black people will feel vindicated and exonerated and will find it easier to deal with their painful past. The test of the sincerity of the acknowledgement will be the new way white people will relate to black people.
The teachings of the South African Church enable it to play an important role in the promotion of psychological restitution. In Christ the dignity of all men and women was restored. It is for this reason that the Bible calls upon all Christians to restore and respect each other's dignity as human beings. No other South African organization is better placed to create so many safe spaces for inter racial interaction than the Church. Not only do the majority of both black and white South Africans belong to a church but membership of the church of Christ prescribes the recognition of the equality of all believers ... and this makes the church the ideal safe space for inter racial story telling. By assisting their white members to "give" themselves to the black members the church will facilitate a process of psychological restitution. Such a process can make a big contribution towards the healing of South Africa.
I am more convinced than ever that our responsibility is to build real relationship with those we feel God is prompting us to, and not simply throw money at a need and hope it will go away. It takes a lot more effort and time to be of lasting help, but the fruit of it proves to me it is worth it - for one, the fruit of my own heart changing as I interact with others.
It may be stretching to reach across racial and cultural barriers, but those relationships become more and more rewarding over time.
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I recently met a black person who spoke about the negative images he had about white people as a small boy. He told me that every time he meets a new white person his negative childhood images taints his initial impressions about the white person. It is only when he gets to know the person better and becomes convinced that the white person differs from his small boy image that he starts looking differently at the white person. The majority of black South Africans grew up with bad images of white people. These images will only change through direct contact with transformed white South Africans. Apartheid had a very negative psychological effect on the majority of South Africans. For South Africans to heal from the effects of its painful history psychological restitution needs to take place. It can only happen through the establishment of new, healthy relationships between black and white South Africans.
Deon